What doesn't kill me can only make me stronger
by The Godess Freya
Summary: This is my second one-shot. I hope you all enjoy . An Ikkaku/OC pairing.


Name: Akane Kogara

Occupation: Shinigami

Division: 11

Seat: 6

Info: A fight happy woman who graduated the shinigami school and went straight into eleventh division. She quickly made her way through the ranks and finally made it to the sixth seat. After that, she was happy with her position and didn't want another promotion, allowing only Ikkaku and Yumichika to beat her in seating rank. She's beautiful, but her fight happy, overbearing nature keeps her from finding men to date.

***************

"The hell you will!" I roared. People milling around me didn't bat an eyelash; this was a common occurance. If they didn't hear a fight at least once a day, they would find it odd.

"You don't fight me, these go for the world to see." He spun the lacy thong around on his finger and I nearly snapped his neck to end my embarrasment.

"You don't need my damn underwear to get me to fight you!" I drew my sword, ready to slit Ikkaku's throat. He grinned as he saw my action and obediantly threw my underwear at me. I snatched them with my left hand and stuffed them in my robes.

"Take it to the training yard," Captain Kyoraku of the eight division called as he passed by us. "I'm sure you two would rather not spend your day cleaning up your mess." The man had a point. With our last battle, it had taken us a week to clean up the mess we'd created, and Old Man Yama-ji wasn't pleased with us for a long time afterwards. I looked at Ikkaku and saw the truce in his eyes. We flash stepped away from the scene, each of us bounding toward Ikkaku's favorite spot in the woods.

"Beat you there!" Ikkaku called.

"Dream on, baldy!" I called back, stepping up the pace.

"Don't call me baldy!" Ikkaku snarled, increasing his speed as well.

"Baldy, baldy, baldy!" I taunted back. I heard him growl and knew we wouldn't make it to the training grounds, and I grinned. Ikkaku was so much fun.

"Come here!" His sword clashed against my own and my typical fight happy smile slid onto my face as I was pushed back a good ten feet.

"You better finish what you start this time!" I said, with a smirk. Last fight I had indeed won, and I wasn't going to let Ikkaku forget it for a long time.

"I always finish what I start!" he yelled back, attacking me in quick succession, his moves meant to tire me. My little jab to his man pride had him fighting harder, causing his plan to backfire. We fought for what seemed like minutes, but the minutes had stretched into almost half an hour. My muscles were on fire and ached in a delicious way, my body grateful for the exercise. Ikkaku was slowing down, still on the offensive. As I deflected a parry and saw a slight opening in his guard, I took the chance and snapped a kick to his open chest. He was thrown backwards, coughing blood from his mouth. Inwardly, I winced at the strength at which I had used, but Ikkaku would hate me if I ever apologized, so I kept my mouth shut.

"Over already, Madarame?" I taunted instead, trying to rally him back into the fight.

"Go to hell, Kogara," he muttered, drawing himself up to his full height once again. With a dignity that I admired, he reigned in his pain and then smiled at me as a predator would his prey.

"Already there, Ikkaku." With that, he jumped at me, and the fight ensued once more. We both were on our last dregs of energy; it would now be a fight to the finish. Quicker and quicker the pace increased until finally, I let down my guard just a hair. However, it was enough for Ikkaku to slash downwards but before I could parry, his sword sunk into my open shoulder. I immediately knelt and groaned once before swallowing my pain and looking back up at my 'trying-not-to-be-concerned' sparring partner.

"Akane, are you-"

"You finish your question, and you die, Ikkaku," I snapped, deeply insulted. The wound was just a mere scratch to what I had suffered at the hands of hollows or even my overzealous captain. "I'll just go and get it healed, then I'll kick your ass tomorrow."

"I can help-" he began again, reaching his hand out to help me up. I literally bit at him and he withdrew his hand before he could touch me. As the 6th seat of the eleventh squad, I could handle standing from a puny little wound.

"I'm fine," I assured him as I stood. I used flash step as I sheathed my weapon and landed on a nearby tree branch overlooking the now destroyed site. "You coming?" I asked before I disspeared once again. I felt Ikkaku begin to follow me and I cursed him for acting like he cared. Sympathy while wounded was my undoing as a woman and it was a weakness that I would continue to hide from the rest of my fellow shinigami.

"Wait up!" Ikkaku called.

"What, can't keep up with me?" I shot back, not slowing down in the slightest.

"Akane, get back here!"

"I have to go to fourth division before Kenpachi finds out. He'd fight me just for losing to you." I shuddered at the thought. My captain didn't take kindly to failure in any form, but it helped our division train harder to become the fighting core of the shinigami.

"I can take you!" Ikkaku continued.

"Jesus, what is with you today?" I snapped, clearly at wits end of how to make him leave me alone. "I'm fine, I'm going to get healed, then I'm going to sleep. Not everything I do has to involve you."

"I never said that!" he yelled back. I could tell he was catching up to me by the increase of the volume of his voice.

"Then stop following me like a lost puppy! I can make it to the damned hospital." I knew it was a low blow for the easygoing byplay between Ikkaku and I, but I was uncomfortable, a rarity for a person such as myself.

"Fine!" Ikkaku yelled before changing direction. I didn't bother to reply, but kept up my speed so I could reach the hospital. I felt a pang of regret and promised myself I'd apologize to him after I had been patched up.

******************

"You're free to go, Kogara-san. Please, take it easy for a few days, and it will heal." I nodded airily to the nurse, not bothering to actually look at her. These people were just convenient to have when I was hurt, but nothing more.

"Thanks," I muttered, before leaving the hospital. I walked towards the small house outside of squad eleven barracks, cursing my foul luck. I hated apologies; they had never come easily to my lips. As I neared my doorway, I saw a small bundle on my little porch and I stopped momentarily.

To my surprise, it moved and my eyes widened. I quickly ran toward the bundle and when I knelt beside it, I felt my surprise slide directly into shock. It was a small child! A small note peeked out from the child's blankets and I pulled out slowly, trying not to wake the sleeping baby. I held it close to see it was a handwritten note. The paper was dusty, meaning that it was poor quality and easy to aquire and the handwriting was nearly illeligible. I began to read the note aloud, stumbling over the words:

Dear Akane,

I'm apologize for the fright Misaki must have caused you, but there was no other way. I admit to being afraid of your squad, but Misaki has a right to have a better life than the one I could have given her. But, I bring grave news of your sister. She was killed by the recent hollow attack on 84 district. She hid Misaki to spare her child's life, but by her request, I have returned the child to her rightful family. On the back of the note is your sister's last words to you. It was meant for you to see.

I flipped the paper over quickly before the grief overwhelmed me.

My darling sister Akane. I long to see you someday, to look into the woman that was my baby sister. After years of searching, I finally have found you. You have made it to the Seretei and into the shinigami school! I am so very proud of you! You must be thrilled to have this opportunity, and it couldn't have happened to a better person. I also write to tell you the good news. I birthed my first child! As I hold her in my arms, I know that she is the most beautiful achievment I have ever accomplished. Therefore, I shall call her Misaki. My beautiful bloom. I hope that we will soon meet, for I admit to wanting to see you again. I will come as soon as I am able, so we may be together again. Too long have we been apart, sister. I love you always, you remember that.

Love, Rie

I looked at the paper, surprised to see it wet. I looked up and realized it wasn't raining, then quietly touched my cheeks. My fingers came away wet and I stared at the teardrops on my fingers as if they were a foreign language I couldn't comprehend. I...was crying.

"Momma?" I turned to the bundle onto to see the child looking at me, her bright blue eyes piercing in their likeness to that of my sister. "Where's momma?" she asked as she kept her trusting gaze on my face. I looked away from her and tried to contain the sobs threatening to overwhelm me.

"She's gone, Misaki." I whispered, shutting my eyes. My eyes betrayed me and continued to cry in earnest.

"When will she be back?"

"Never, Misaki. She's dead." Even though the child was young, she deserved to know the truth. When her wide eyes rounded, I realized she was older than I thought her to be. "She's with the angels, now. She's singing, waiting for you to join her one day."

"I'll see her again?" Misaki asked, her own eyes full of tears.

"Yeah," I answered, my voice gruff with emotion. "Yeah you will." With my little promise, Misaki unwound the blankets from her little body and walked over to me. She then threw her arms around my neck and began to cry herself. A small yet innate feminine instinct in me surfaced and I held the small child to me, letting us share our grief together.

*************

"This is my home," I stated with a sweeping arm. Little Misaki held fast to my other arm, as if she was afriad to let go. I didn't blame her. She'd gone through a tough ordeal, but she was pulling through masterfully for someone so young. "I have an extra bedroom, but we'll go fix it up for you. Would...you like that?" I was stretching myself onto a limb here. Never had I even held a child's hand before and now I had one to take care of.

"I'd like that, Akane-san."

"Please, just Akane." I thought some more about what I should get the child. "We should get clothes for you as well."

"Wait!" Misaki said, walking into my small kitchen and opening various cabinet doors. "Where's your pots and pans? Where's the food?" She whirled to face me, her small hands on her hips, and I grinned. God, she was so much like Rie.

"I eat out most of the time." My little Misaki held up an accusing finger and glared at me, as if I had done something heinous.

"That's bad. Momma told me how to cook, and I can do the same for you." All I could feel was pride at what Rie had brought into this world. Here she was motherless, and she was in a stranger's house, lecturing on how she ate out all the time. The fiery temper that had always been Rie's strong point had indeed passed to her child and I was grateful. I couldn't have handled a whiny brat.

"All right then," I agreed, holding up my hands in self defense, the smile still on my face. "We'll go shopping for that too. Anything else we can get?" I asked with a smirk.

"Don't take that tone with me, young lady." I began laughing, knowing Rie's tutelage when I heard it. Boy, the kid had some spunk.

"All right, all right. We ready?" Almost as quick as it had happened, a seed of doubt crept into the little girl's eyes and she went to hold my hand again. "Oi," I started, holding up her chin on one hand. "Never let 'em see your weakness. You have to be strong when you're around people. Got it?" Misaki bit her lip, but nodded, determination clear on her features. "Good. Then let's go."

************

"Akane!" I turned to see Izuru, the lieutenant of the third division, waving at me.

"Hey Izuru," I greeted, watching Misaki out of the corner of my eye. She was looking over pans with I judged to be an expert eye, so I left her alone to buy what seemed best. If cooking made this child feel better, then I could buy her some damn pots. "What are you doing out today? I thought you had exercises with your squad."

"No, they were canceled by Yamamoto-taichou. What are you doing here today?" he asked.

"Buying stuff for my niece."

"Your niece?" Izuru asked, his eyes wide and mouth gaping. "You never told me you had a niece." I shrugged.

"I didn't know either. She just appeared on my doorstep."

"What about her mother?" My eyes hardened.

"Dead. Killed in the hollow attack."

"I'm sorry," Izuru said, placing a consoling hand on my shoulder. I waved his sympathy off.

"Don't worry about it."

"So are you going to keep your niece?" Izuru asked, withdrawing his hand. He knew me well enough to realize that I hated sympathy.

"Yeah," I said gruffly, thrusting my hands into my pockets. "I can tell she's a good kid. Rie raised her well."

"Who's Rie?"

"My sister. I tried to find her in Rugonkai, but...I didn't get there in time." This time, Izuru simply nodded. Misaki finally bounded over to me, her little arms laden with her purchases. I quickly took the bags, knowing she couldn't carry that much weight for long.

"Hello," Misaki greeted before I could introduce them. "I'm Misaki."

"I'm Izuru," my friend greeted, a small smile on his face. I could see his eyes soften a bit and knew that he would make a wonderful father, if given the chance.

"Hello, Izuru-kun. Would you like to go shopping with us? Akane's going to buy me some clothes." Never in my life had I heard so much excitement over clothes, and I realized it made me happy to see Misaki happy. Izuru looked at me and I subtly shrugged. He turned back to Misaki.

"I would be honored," he said. Misaki smile lit onto her face, revealing her joy. She grabbed Izuru's hand and pulled him forward. I snickered at his surprised face, but he relaxed, letting the small girl walk him to the next shop. She let go of Izuru's hand and bounded inside the small store, anxiously looking at all of the clothes.

"What do you think, Izuru?" I asked him.

"You're right. She's a good kid."

"What are you doing?" I heard, and judging by the tone in Ikkaku's voice, he was ready for our daily fight.

"What does it look like, baldy?" I rolled my eyes at his ridiculous question and continued to watch my little niece have the time of her life.

"The hell are those...pots? Why would YOU need pots?" Ikkaku asked, surprise and taunting laced within his voice.

"Well, you see, Ikkaku, these are used to cook. Now, pay attention, because I might lose you within this explanation-"

"I know what cooking is, dumbass."

"Hey, watch the language." This made Ikkaku stop and stare at me as if I had grown two heads. Even Izuru was surprised at first, but a small smile slid onto his face.

"Why would you care-"

"Akane!" I turned back to Misaki, who had a pile of clothes piled on her arms.

"Go try 'em on first, Misaki." She beamed at me and scampered off, no doubt excited to try these new clothes on.

"Who was she?" Ikkaku asked.

"My kid," I answered, surprising myself with my protectiveness. "So don't swear around her."

"Your....your...kid?" Ikkaku sputtered. "You have a kid and didn't tell me?!?!?"

"I don't see how it's any of your business," I shot back, annoyed at him. He'd always managed to get under my skin, and today was no exception.

"Who's the father? Izuru?" I quirked an eyebrow at my blond haired friend, who was coughing.

"So, Izuru, did we have a wild passionate orgy?" The coughing increased and a blush crept onto his features. Taking this as a 'yes', Ikkaku glared at me, and I nearly dropped the pans on my arms to reach for my sword. He looked...infuriated. I had never seen him this angry and I was afraid he would attack either of us with little or no cause.

"Ikkaku-" I began to explain, but he cut me off.

"I don't want to hear your pathetic excuses."

"They're not excuses, jackass, it's the truth!" My hands were curled into fists at my side and I was rapidly reaching the point of attacking Ikkaku just out of sheer annoyance. "Misaki's not-"

"That's her name? Misaki?"

"Oh for the love of god, Ikkaku! If you quit interrupting me, I can explain!" Ikkaku began to reach for his sword and I dropped the groceries on my arms to have more manuverability.

"Akane! I'm done!" I turned to see Misaki standing innocently behind me and I quickly flash stepped to her side, holding her in a protective embrace. "Akane-"

"Hush for a second," I whispered, watching Ikkaku. If he attacked Misaki, I wasn't going to hold back this time. He would be in a fight for his life. Ikkau watched the two of us, his hand on the hilt of his sword. Misaki fortunately realized the gravity of the situation, and snuggled closer to me. I laid my chin on the top of her hand and pulled her closer, drawing my own zanpakutō. I had lost Rie and I sure as hell wasn't going to lose Misaki.

"Ikkaku-" Izuru began, but mercifully, Ikkaku bounded off, letting me relax and release Misaki. Izuru turned to me, apology written on his face, but I smiled a reassuring smile at him.

"Who's that?" Misaki asked.

"A problem," I muttered, standing and sheathing my sword. "And one's that going to be dealt with soon enough."

**************

A year later, I was making my rounds in the Seretei, wondering what Misaki was making for supper tonight. She was always trying new recipies, and I was sure tonight wasn't going to be an exception.

"Move." I jolted out of my thoughts to see Ikkaku standing in front of me, his face devoid of emotion.

"Whatever," I muttered, stepping to the side and allowing him to pass me. He deliberately brushed my shoulder as he walked away, but I let it slide. He was angry at me but I wouldn't stoop to his level. He didn't want to hear the truth, so he could act like a jackass if he wanted. I had Misaki now and she was the last of my family. I would choose Misaki over my friendship with Ikkaku if this was how shallow it had become. If he wanted to be a dick, fine. If he wanted to act like a juvenile child, fine. That was his decision, and not mine.

"Attention Gotei 13. Hollows sighted at the eleventh division grounds. All units, proceed to the grounds. I repeat, all units proceed over to the grounds."

"Misaki," I breathed, fear clogging my throat. Ikkaku must have heard, because he turned to say something to me. Yet it was too late. I was already gone, flash stepping over to my house. All I knew was that I had to get there before the hollows did. I couldn't protect Rie, but I could damn well make sure Misaki would live. That I swore.

*************

Misaki hummed merrily, making an extra special dinner for her aunt. If she had enjoyed the spaghetti she had managed to make last night, she would definately like the pizza recipe she had managed to find. Akane should be home soon, so she knew that the pizza would have to be done and the newly bought table set for two. Misaki grabbed to cups and placed them in front of both of the chairs, then turned to get plates.

Almost at once, she heard a loud crash. She jumped, her wide eyes fearful. She quickly ran to the door and peeked outside. It was them! The monsters with the white masks! The ones who had killed mommie! She felt anger, but quickly felt fear once again. She closed the door and ran back inside Akane's house and into her room. She slid under her bed and covered her head with her hands. Akane would come. Akane would save her.

**************

I sliced through another hollow, still using shunpo to get closer to my house. Ikkaku was yelling at me to stop, but I kept ignoring him. I might be punished after this, but I didn't care. I had more important things to worry about. Another hollow felt the bite of my blade and dissapeared. I jumped off a roof and saw my house in the distance. Three menos grande surrounded it, trampling the buildings around my house. Soon, they would reach my house, and Misaki might be hurt. I couldn't allow it.

"I'm coming, Misaki!" I yelled as loud I could, not caring in the slightest that I was giving away my greatest weakness. I stepped to the side as a hollow sliced, then returned the favor and cut his mask away, not staying to watch him dissapear. Another jump brought me within range of the first of the three giant menos grande.

"Splinter, Diamond Ice!" My zanpakutō froze from the hilt and when it reached the blade, it shrank and elongated into a whip of pure diamonds, covered in ice. I flicked my wrist wounding the leg of the menos. It turned and saw me. A small red light began to form at its mouth and my eyes widened. A cero blast! I jumped up as high as I could and the menos shot of its attack. I sliced my whip downwards, managing to cut the cero in half. The two halves flew by me harmlessly and I flicked my wrist again, bringing down my zanpakutō clear through the menos's face. Where my zanpakutō had cut, ice began to form, slowly spreading across its mask. It dissapeared and I fell to the ground, ready to jump at the two remaining menos grandes.

Fortunately for me, the fight happy eleventh division had taken up the other two, each fighting for the bragging rights of killing a menos grande. I ignored them and my sword melted back to normal, letting me sheath my weapon and run inside.

"Misaki? Misaki?" I cried, looking around frantically for my child. "Misaki! Where are you! Misaki! It's Akane! Answer me!" I looked around the house, looking around and under anything she could have used as cover. It was no use. She was gone. I ran back outside, and saw that one menos remained.

"Splinter, Diamond Ice!" Pissed beyond belief I jumped and angrily made cuts over the top half of its body, making it pay for taking Misaki away from me. The other people of the division, fell back, knowing my whip could potentially hurt them. Finally, I sliced clean down the hollow's mask and it dissapeared. I looked around for more potential targets and saw nothing. Everything had been killed by my division. I dropped to the ground, ignoring the surprised stares and walked back inside my house.

"I'm sorry, Misaki," I whispered, sheathing my sword.

"For what?" I turned to see my little niece standing by Ikkaku's side. I knelt and she ran into my open arms.

"My god, Misaki. I thought I'd lost you." Tears leaked down my face once more, but I didn't care. Misaki was safe. I looked back up at Ikkaku. "Thanks, Ikkaku. For saving her." He walked over to me and knelt to look at me face to face.

"She's not your child," he stated softly.

"No. She's my niece. My only family left." Misaki, who had always been too perceptive for her own good, withdrew herself from my arms.

"Oh, Akane! The pizza!" She darted away and I let my hands drop the ground.

"She's my sister's kid," I explained, not looking Ikkaku in the eye. "They dropped her off on my doorstep and I took her in. I couldn't just leave her out, you know?"

"You're the last person I'd expect to take in a kid," he commented. I felt a small spark of anger and I glared at Ikkaku through my rapidly drying tears.

"Just because I'm fight happy doesn't mean I don't give a damn," I muttered.

"You were the one always preaching about not showing weaknesses." I stood angrily and swiped the tears from my face.

"Yeah, well, you can go to hell, Ikkaku," I growled out, my hands fisted at my sides. "She's not a weakness, she's a strength."

"If you say so," he retorted, standing as well. In a fit of rage, I swung at him, but he caught my arm easily, predicting my moves. He pulled me close to where our faces were inches apart. "There's my Akane."

"Your Akane!" I breathed out. "I don't belong to anyone you son of a-" Ikkaku's lips crashed onto mine, cutting of my valiant retort. He dropped my arm and pulled me close to his hard body. His touch was rough, his grip on my arms not to gentle, but my god it turned me on.

"You were saying?" Ikkaku asked, pulling away an inch.

"I guess I could make an exception for you," I whispered.

"As long as you wear these," Ikkaku said, the same black lacy underwear on his finger once again.

"Dammit, Ikkaku!" I growled out, annoyed once again. Yet on the inside, I was deliriously happy. I had a family. I was going to have a lover. I rolled my eyes, looking up at the ceiling as if I was annoyed.

Thank you for everything, Rie. I'll take care of Misaki.

I promise.


End file.
